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Something I have always strived for in my life is confidence. I wanted to appear confident to the world and be confident in what ever I put my mind to.  Feedback indicates I have definitely conquered the first but not so much the latter. No matter what I had gone on to achieve and overcome, there was an internal battle with self doubt.

Taking a closer look at what confidence meant has helped me understand my struggle. In Latin, confidence is called ‘fidere’ and fidere means to trust. I realised me, myself and I had some serious trust issues.

I had to learn to earn my trust in order to become confident in myself. This looked like; setting goals and actually achieving them, establishing boundaries with real consequences and to be compassionate but reflective of my mistakes. I had to show myself a certain level of competence in these areas in order to gain my trust.  I realised that I couldn’t give up when things became too difficult or too painful for me to deal with. Persevering through fear and ambiguity  helped me see where one of the issues with confidence and self trust came from.  Giving up is all too easy but having faith in yourself and  your vision can help bring clarity and the outcomes you have always wanted.

Confidence comes from trusting the process and trusting yourself in that process.  When you learn to embrace uncertainty because you believe in yourself and your capabilities you will have mastered the art of self confidence. 

What do you believe has made you confident on yourself? Is this an area you believe you would have to work on?

 

 

Photo by De Andre Bush